EXCLUSIVE interview with Christopher Nolan*

Southern View: Thanks for agreeing to talk to us, Christopher Nolan. For those of you who don’t know, Christopher Nolan is the director behind Inception, the batman trilogy and the upcoming film Interstellar.

Christopher Nolan: Who are you talking to?

S.V.: It doesn’t matter.  Now, in the first batman movie, Bruce Wayne creates a sort of moral code against using guns. Does this reflect some sort of view you have on firearms?

C.N.: Well, it’s more of plot point than a political statement, but I suppose it is sort of a message against gun violence.

S.V.: So would it be fair to say that you hate the second amendment?

C.N.: Wait! That’s not what I was trying to-

S.V.: Moving on, what do you think of intellectual property?

C.N.: What… what does that have to do with my movies?

S.V.: Well, some say that Inception is about intellectual property, what with the idea stealing and such.

C.N.: But, but I didn’t prepare for this! I planned to drop some cryptic hints about Interstellar, not get grilled on my political views!

S.V.: Okay, okay, I understand.

C.N.: Good.

S.V.: Now what do you think the war in Vietnam?

C.N.: Um, but… you said… um, didn’t that end decades ago?

S.V.: I see, you don’t think that we should even think about past events and just throw all of history out the window, is that what you’re saying?

C.N.: No!

S.V.: Now, let’s talk environment. If we raised taxes on the top income bracket by 2%, studies say we could end global warming in five years. What do you think of that?

C.N.: I would be affected by that tax hike, but if we could really end global warming in only half a decade I guess that I’m for it.

S.V.: Wow. I would have never guessed that you were anti-business and would trust a statistic based mostly on guess work.

C.N.: But you just told me that statistic!

S.V.: Well, that’s all the time we have. Just to recap, world famous director Christopher Nolan is anti-second amendment, anti-history and anti-economy. See next week’s Southern View to see what happens when we ask the band Arcade Fire about racial stereotypes in the media!