Responding to fears expressed by the community that this year’s Edina Robotics team robot would turn evil, the team (known as Green Machine) told reporters that they were roughly 65% sure that their creation would not gain self-awareness and attack the community like before.
“Look, I know we have a bad track record with this sort of stuff,” said team leader Jenny Sorenson, “But you have to trust us to do everything in our power to make sure this robot doesn’t pose a threat to humanity. You can sleep soundly knowing that there’s only an outside chance that the robot we make will burn down EPAC or give the the key to the school to the Russian mafia.”
“The past incidents weren’t entirely our fault,” added Sorenson. “The competition has a disturbing trend of issuing challenges that lend themselves to evil robots. I mean, ‘make a robot capable of posing a threat to humanity’ really limits your options in terms of non-malicious automatons.”
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